Electronic Device One-Pager

Top Electronic Device Excuses

(Click to enlarge)

Here are some of the more common remarks when I attempt to confiscate an electronic device in class.

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Found This on the Floor

district

I would never criticize teachers, the union, or our school district. But I did “find this on the floor” at work near my classroom. I don’t know who would risk their career to draw something politically divisive like this, but I wanted to post it as an example as what not to draw. 🙂

It’s That Time of Year

wil work for extra credit

It’s that time of year when all the poor souls who have avoided doing any work attempt to persuade you to help them out, using all manner of ethos, logos, and pathos. Stand strong! Do not give in!

It May Help to Remember This…

little attention

These last three weeks before Christmas break can be a trying and stressful time. When students are acting out and getting on your nerves, just remember that they are still just children. I know they don’t seem like children sometimes because they appear so big and adult-like, but that is just their hard shell. Inside this tough, outer exterior is a soft filling. If you don’t believe me, bring in small prizes to give out: little keychains, small Happy Meal-type toys, candy, whatever…and see the excitement in their eyes when you show them. Or announce that you will be playing a game to review for a test, play some music, or take them outside the classroom for the day. They won’t be able to contain their gleeful joy. Because they are children. And children need attention. If they don’t get it, then you have a disaster on your hands for three weeks. Invest in a little attention and show your kids you care…and they might, too. 🙂 Good luck!

My Son is a Very Good Kid!

my son has never been in trouble

Ah, parents. They live in an insulated world of fluffy fantasy, like Candyland. I imagine pink puffy cotton candy floating in front of their eyes, blinding them from the reality of who their children really are.

I’m a parent, too. I remember the night my child called me into her room the fifteenth time and I made the connection: she was only four years old and manipulating me!

“Do you think she might actually be trying to avoid going to sleep?” I asked my husband.

“Well, DUH,” he replied.

So, sometimes our view of who our children are does not always overlap with reality. Teachers are parents’ greatest allies. We know so much about their children…who their friends are, who they’re dating, how they break rules and lie about it to cover it up, how they cheat, what they really think about their parents, how they feel about their families, what they did over the weekend (what they told me they did, what they told their friends they did, and what their private confiscated notes indicated they really did), and what their goals, interests, and aspirations are. I just wish that sometimes parents would work with me instead of against me so that we can both help their child to become the best person possible. How can they help their children if they don’t even know who they are, or believe me when I tell them what the child needs?

Warm and Fuzzy

love more than parents

I know it kind of looks like the teacher is about to smack the kid upside the head, but I just need to work on drawing hands. She’s supposed to be raising her arm up questioningly, like “why?” and the student is supposed to be lifting his hands in a shrug, like “I don’t know.” The text below reads, “Sometimes, students feel like you love them more than their parents do.”

So today, on Black Friday, know that even though our world is crazy, commercialized, violent, and sometimes downright unpleasant, remember that you really do make a difference. You might feel like a cog in the corporate machine, just another number, a faceless part of the masses out shopping today, but remember that someone at school thinks you are special. Some of your students look up to you and know you care. You mean something to someone…or quite a few someones. 🙂

 

I Went to College for THIS?

went to college

Sometimes, we have lofty aspirations when we attend college. We may believe we can change the world through the power of education. We may think that we can remedy injustice by promoting equality and fairness.  We may even believe that we can be a source of light in a world of darkness.

However, one of the many ways that teaching slowly wears down idealism is the inconsiderate kids and how they will often throw their trash right on the floor. My pet peeve is that they are not permitted to eat in my class and then they sneak their candy and toss the wrappers right by their desks.

Another thing they eat in class is Hot Cheetos, which have a fluorescent red powder that remains on their fingers. They often drop these snacks or wrappers on the floor and then when you ask if it’s theirs, they hold up their red hands and say, “No, they’re not mine!” They were caught red-handed and still deny it!

Still, I recommend teaching. Go get your degree. But just be mindful that there are some challenges. Some days are just better than others.

Special Guest Cartoonist Today

moms work

It may be a little hard to read but the dialogue reads like this:

Teacher: “Go back to your seat!”

“Some Kid”: “No, Ms. C.!!!”

Teacher: “NOW!!!”

My 6 year-old daughter drew this comic to illustrate the stories I tell her about my students. I think she will be a better artist than me as she seems to understand the complexities of relationships and the humor of the situations. 🙂