Nothing to Complain About

nothing to complain about

This wouldn’t be me.

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Cool Tattoo!

nerd tattoos

I am a person who regrets my tattoos, so I sympathize with those who might impulsively get a tattoo. Here is a quick, off-the-top-of-my-head rough guidelines to help those who might be considering a tattoo:

1. Generally, only tattoo a child’s name on yourself — all other relationships may change or end over time.
2. Tattoos of someone’s face may seem cute, but the artist isn’t always as good as you think he or she will be.
3. Music bands, TV shows, movies, and sports teams that seem cool now likely won’t be in twenty years.
4. Your body is not a varsity jacket — let others sing praises about your accomplishments. (Some exceptions include notable military achievements, winning the Superbowl, etc.)
5. Matching tattoos might seem cool now, but see #1…BFFs aren’t always forever.
6. Think carefully about a tattoo in another language. Make sure you understand all the connotations of what it says.
7. Try not to get a tattoo when you are grieving, especially over a pet.
8. Popular phrases now will probably become trite (“That’s hot!”, “You’re fired!”, “Where’s the beef?”, or “My bad!” for example)
9. Carefully weigh the consequences of visible tattoos (This is for the manager at the grocery store and the blood draw nurse at the hospital – you know who you are.)
10. Everybody knows a gang/prison tattoo when they see it.
11. Due to gravity, all skin will sag. Consider how that heart will look stretched out like a green bean.
12. Don’t assume the tattoo artist knows how to spell.

No offense if your tattoos match any of the above criteria, I’m sure they look great! This is just for those other people, you know, the ones whose tattoos don’t look cool like yours. 🙂